Wednesday, January 12, 2011

The Truth, At Last

I came out to my mom today. My head's still reeling, so I can't really say much about it. It just found its way into the conversation, I forget how. The coming out part was pretty natural, just like any old conversation over lunch. We also had a 3-hour debate concerning norms, gender equality, religion, personal opinion--really, my head's throbbing. We're always like that, but it's only now that I appreciate where I got my debating skills. 

For the most part, she was okay with it--except for the God's orginal design angle. As I expected, she had an idea already, and my confirmation was all she needed. Although, I told her about the possibility of me being bi, and she thinks that sexual orientation is a choice, so she's probably holding on the 5% chance that I'll find a guy to marry one day. Knowing my mom, I told her not to expect any husband from me--kids, maybe, but  then she can't wrap her head around the idea of a homosexual couple raising kids, so...

She doesn't like the idea of promoting gender equality, and she thinks that changing culture is both impossible and superfluous. That's where the debate was centered on. In the end, she just told me to be prepared for the consequences of my choices in life--since, you know, she believes while I can't choose to be straight, I can choose to marry a man if I wanted a family; thus she feels I'm just being adamant on this whole lesbianism thing.

Still, I don't know, it's nice that she finally, finally knows. There's still my dad, who'll probably have a fit when he finds out. My mom will probably tell him, and it'll take a day of explaining or something. But right now I'm just glad that I've told my mom. She's not ecstatic over it, but she accepts it, at least, and that's great news for me. It feels like a sigh of relief after holding my breath for so long.

9 comments:

Arlet Villanueva said...

Yay you Rz!

iehl said...

Good job! :)

one_blissful_nomad said...

Nice! Finally!

Never mind how tough it was, what is important is the good feeling after. :)

rz fortajada said...

Arlet & Iehl: Thank you! Hugz! Hahaha.

Blissful nomad: Thanks :) Yeah, it just felt like half of a huge load was lifted from my chest. :P

firewomyn said...

wow! am soo proud (and envious of course) of you!!! *hugs!*

scout said...

Re: Original design, some biologists argue that homosexuality plays a crucial role in curbing overpopulation which immensely benefits society, so we do serve our purpose. :)

Andami ko sanang gustong sabihin pero baka masakit pa ulo mo, so I'd just like to say that I'm happy for you, RZ. Acceptance is a good start. Take it one day at a time. :)

firewomyn said...

hey, i just made you my LABIA (Lesbian And a Blogger Intl Awards) for January :) featured your blog =)

rz fortajada said...

Scout: Thank you! Ayan, hindi na masakit ulo ko. :)) And I think my mom's getting used to it. Well, wala namang masyadong nag-iba :))

rz fortajada said...

firewomyn: Wow! Haha. Thank you! :) Teka mabasa nga. :D

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